Twinkle Khanna on her writing being just like her—real and raw

You know her as Twinkle Khanna, you know her as Mrs Funnybones. For years now, Khanna has shown she’s the jack of all trades having struck the perfect balance between the many roles that she plays—writer, entrepreneur, producer, and mother amongst the ones at the top of my head. Despite different roles, one will always find her wit and humour intact. While striking the perfect balance may not come easy, her secret mantra is not always rooting for perfection but doing what you need to, in that moment, to the best of your ability.

In an exclusive interview with Bazaar India, the actor, author, interior designer speaks about women mothering their husbands, raising sons the right way, and what she does when faced with a writer’s block 

Harper’s Bazaar: The Kaleido collection celebrates the multifacetedness of a woman who strikes a balance between the many roles she plays. You’re an entrepreneur who dons many hats. How delighted are you to be part of your association the brand?

Twinkle Khanna: As a child, I had a journal filled with terrible poems and sketches of jewellery and three-legged tables. As an adult, I am again more of an accessories-oriented person than someone who loves clothes. When I saw the pieces by Her Story and the ideation behind the collection, I felt that this multitasking woman was truly relatable. The pieces are finely made and what I loved was the feeling of being all dressed up with their jewellery, even on days when you are just bumming around in jeans.

Harper’s Bazaar: Your thoughts and ideas are witty, yet hit the nail on the head—you have spoken about how women across the globe are always playing “Mummy to someone else’s Raja beta (dear one),” a child who they did not raise, produce or adopt. What do you think will it take to change such a mind-set as we hope to see thought lead to action?

TK: It took centuries to build this construct and it will take time to dismantle it. The only way forward is to raise our children without gender biases and be aware of the unconscious biases that we are still carrying along—and that without realising, we are tunnelling into young minds.

Harper’s Bazaar: There is so much focus on raising our daughters right, yet making them feel independent and liberated. Why doesn’t anyone talk about raising our sons the correct way?

TK: Well, I did write a column about how to raise our sons the right way and not just focus on raising our daughters. If you ask me, just the way you have to train and get a license to drive after passing a test, being a parent should also require some prior training. All of us are just winging it and hoping for the best at this point.

HB: What is the correct way according to you?

TK: I think the correct way is to lead by example.

HB: The next generation needs to be raised differently to bring a change in society. Where and how can that happen?

TK: You are asking me these questions as if I am an expert. Perhaps it would be better to wait and see how my children turn out before I start dispensing advice.

HB: Do you procrastinate a lot? And what does Twinkle Khanna do when she’s faced with a writer’s block?

TK: I am someone who likes to over-prepare, and the only way to do that is to start earlier than required so you give yourself some elbow room. A writer’s block, on the other hand, would have to be tackled by reading a lot about that subject or similar things and then going for a walk, or playing with my dog. Eventually, all the dots will join up in my head, usually when I am in the shower the next day.

HB: Does your writing prove you’re real, raw, and human? How do you deal with failure and insecurities?

TK: No. It proves that the only way I know how to process the world is by writing my way through it. Failure and insecurities are part of life and I deal with them by reminding myself that I am good enough. I force myself to look back at the things I have done successfully so I have the strength to get up, dust off my well-padded bottom, and try again.