What women want—a collection of anonymous no-holds-barred fantasies that should be your next read

The first thing that strikes you while reading Want—a collection of 174 anonymous sexual fantasies submitted by women from across the world—is how candid and honest it is. Yes, sometimes these fantasies are significantly odd, like the woman who wants to have sex with her office doorknob, or the one who fantasises about Big Foot, and another about aliens, but hey it’s your fantasy! And that’s the whole point of the book—women revealing their deep, dark desires behind the safe wall of anonymity. 

Want is edited by Gillian Anderson who became interested in the subject while researching for her role as a charismatic therapist in Netflix’s Sex Education (2019). In her introduction, she tells us that she found it surprising that a great number of women continue to keep their fantasies to themselves. “Many of those who wrote to me are loud, proud, confident women owning and celebrating their sexual power, but just as many expressed feeling shame and guilt in seeking sexual comfort and satisfaction,” she writes. And as we read through these letters, some filling up pages with details of a would-be erotic encounter, while others stark in their brevity, (“Deep raw-dog a**l”; “Every night I dream I have sex with the actor Pedro Pascal”), we come across a variety of women. There’s the Jewish woman who confesses that she dreams of her partner’s death as then she would be free to explore her true feelings for women. “I am happily married. I think. My husband is a great guy...But sometimes I wonder how my life would be if he died. I wonder if I’d be brave. If my tastes would change,” she writes. There’s the Sikh woman who fantasises about her brother-in-law, a man who was in love with her long before she married her husband. The white Christian woman who orgasms by thinking of her husband cheating on her. A bisexual white American woman who fantasises about submitting to older women but also feels guilty. “Even as I am writing this I feel disgusted with myself. I am not supposed to have those thoughts and it makes me want to scrub myself clean and crawl into bed with my husband,” she confesses. And that’s what makes Want an addictive read. For every woman who writes about a no-holds-barred, crazy sexual encounter, there’s another who feels guilty and is filled with shame. Want gives us an access into the most truthful corners of these women’s lives where even in their fantasies they are not free of societal expectations.

The book is divided into chapters such as ‘Rough and Ready’, ‘To Be Worshipped’, ‘Off Limits’, ‘The Captive’, ‘Kink’, ‘Power and Submission’, to name a few, and some fantasies can make the reader uncomfortable. There are those that contain descriptions of sex that blur the line between consensual and non-consensual. Interestingly, many of the letters that detail dreams of being dominated and ceding control describe careers that come with great responsibility and power. In submitting to another’s will in a fantasy is a way to shut out the pressure to constantly perform and make responsible decisions in their personal and professional lives.

The insecurities that women feel also come through in these fantasies. They all, of course, want to be desired. Some even worshipped. But there are also those who imagine they are a flawless version of themselves in their fantasy. “Younger and with perkier breasts,” writes one woman. 

At the end of the day, the book, as is its name, is about what women really want. Read and see what resonates with you.

All images: Courtesy Bloomsbury Publishing

This piece originally appeared in the October-November print edition of Harper's Bazaar India.

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