How vulnerability helps build trust and intimacy in a relationship

It is not a weakness; it is strength!

- Akanksha Narang
Jun 18, 2023

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There are so many people around me who feel the need to hide their vulnerable side because they are conditioned to believe being vulnerable means being weak. Since childhood, we are told to not cry and toughen up. They say strong people don’t cry or feel emotionally overwhelmed with things.

But emotional vulnerability is far from being a sign of weakness. If anything, it’s a sign of strength. It is all about emotional transparency and acknowledging your most unpleasant feelings instead of ignoring them or pretending they don’t exist. It takes a lot to sit face-to-face with your feelings even when it’s hurting you, especially in relationships as you allow another person in.

People in the process of unlearning unhealthy patterns we were taught about feelings, often enter relationships with walls up. They will share their happiest selves but often mask their insecurities, anxieties, and difficult emotions, creating a barrier between them and their partners.

However, vulnerability plays a significant role in building trust and intimacy in relationships. When we are vulnerable, we allow ourselves to be open and honest about our thoughts, feelings, and experiences, even if they are uncomfortable or make us feel exposed. By sharing our vulnerabilities, we demonstrate a level of trust and create an opportunity for a deeper connection with others.

Here are a few reasons why vulnerability is important in building trust and intimacy.

We show our true selves

When you’re being vulnerable with someone, you are revealing your deepest self to them, including even the not-so-pleasant things. Everyone experiences a wide range of emotions and you can’t hide the unpleasant ones from your partner; authenticity allows your partner to see you as you are, without pretences or masks. It creates a sense of transparency and honesty that fosters trust and allows for a genuine connection to form.

It builds an emotional connection

Sharing our innermost thoughts and feelings enables emotional connection. It allows us to express our fears, insecurities, and desires, creating a space for empathy and understanding. When we are vulnerable with others, they often reciprocate, leading to a deeper emotional bond.

It makes you feel comfortable

Sharing vulnerabilities requires trust. When we expose our weaknesses or share sensitive information, we rely on the other person to handle that information with care and compassion. This mutual trust strengthens the relationship and creates a safe environment where both parties feel comfortable being open and honest.

It fosters empathy and support

Vulnerability invites empathy and support from your partner. When we reveal our vulnerabilities, we allow others to see our human side and understand the challenges we face. This understanding often leads to empathy, where others can relate to our experiences and offer support and encouragement.

Overcoming barriers

Being vulnerable can help break barriers and walls that may exist between individuals. It encourages open communication and can dissolve misunderstandings or conflicts. By sharing vulnerabilities, we create an environment where both parties feel heard and understood, fostering a stronger sense of intimacy.