Why are celebrities putting hearts and other emojis on their babies' faces: privacy or plain superstition?

A few days ago, when I was scrolling through Instagram to see the Diwali cheer, Priyanka Chopra’s picture of her first Diwali with her daughter Malti caught my eye. I couldn’t help but notice that here was another parent who chose to upload a photo of their baby with an emoji on their face. I knew she wasn’t the first, and certainly won’t be the last, but I’ve seen this trend way too many times to not have questions about it. For instance, why don’t parents choose not to share a picture at all? Why are they hesitant to upload one where their bundle of joy is in full display? It was time to get some answers. 

I spoke with close friends, who are new parents, and a couple of psychologists to understand what prompts parents to create a balance between their social media activities and protecting the privacy of their child. It’s the right baby steps that you want to take.  

THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS

Having a baby certainly ranks on the ‘top life moments’ list for a lot of people. And most parents leave no stone unturned in letting the world know about their mini-me, but with caution. Speaking about the use of emojis on their baby’s faces, Kamna Chhibber, clinical psychologist and head of the Department of Mental Health and Behavioral Sciences at Fortis Healthcare, makes it crystal clear, “Parents want to share the joyful experience of having a baby and tell the world how their life has changed. But they also want to maintain the privacy of the child. They are concerned about the child’s safety and worry that the photo might end up being misused. They are always faced with this conundrum, and as a result, a lot of them tend to opt for the safer option-concealing the key features of the child instead of disclosing the entire image. It’s all about being cautious.” With there being a rampant rise in cyber crime involving children with their photos being morphed and misused, there is absolutely no second-guessing why parents choose to be this cautious. 

Sherene Aftab, founder at Serene Hour Counselling & Career Advice Consultancy, is a psychologist and a mother to twin boys. As a mother she resonates with the new parents and has the same concerns as them. “Parents want to introduce their kid to the world, and at the same time protect their privacy. I, too, am guilty of doing this. When I had my twins, I uploaded their very first photo months after they were born. And as I’m not tech-savvy, I put a white blob over their faces rather than the cute emojis that parents use these days. But I come from the same school of thought - I want to tell the world, but at the same time protect our privacy.” 

THE NOTION OF NAZAR

You don’t really know who’s watching you on social media. How close are you to each and every follower in your account? And in a country of more than a billion people (which means double the eyes), there’s no surprise to see us Indians believe in nazar (evil eye). We’ll think a million times before telling someone about the good things in our life. Mehezabin Dordi, clinical psychologist, Sir H. N. Reliance Foundation Hospital, Mumbai, attributes this school of thought to superstition. “We've been conditioned to not show the face of the baby before a certain date or time. But let’s not forget that we live in an era where sometimes the child's digital footprint is created before its birth. Today, it's all about the likes and external validation, but parents also want to have control over the situation.”

Chhibber, too, believes the same. “You don’t want to expose your child to bad energy and vibes. Parents want to maintain boundaries. It is like you’re drawing a line as to what you want to share and how much of it you want to make visible to a larger audience.” 

Abhishek Mehta, a very close friend of mine, who recently became father to a baby girl, wants to nip the problem in the bud. “If you believe in the concept of nazar so much, then why would you upload the picture in the first place? It is FOMO that compels most people to share each and every thing happening in their life, but most often it is with a filter (in the most literal sense). I think one should either put up their baby’s picture without an emoji or not put it up at all. As a third option, you can find creative ways to hide the baby’s face—simply turn the baby’s face towards the parent’s chest..” 

FOR YOUR EYES ONLY

I think, the most important thing that one must consider during a situation like this is who will be seeing these photos. Priyanka Chopra, as of today, has 83.1mn followers. She, like most other parents, will choose to show us only what she wants to. For all we know, the actress might have a private account of a handful, where she uploads snaps of cute little Malti without the emojis. That’s something Shraddha Uchil, an acquaintance and mother of a three-year-old girl, does. Her personal account is public and has just two photos of her three-year-old, Luna (where her face is turned the other way). That said, she's created another account, a private one that has posts and pictures from the time when she was pregnant to one where Luna is all smiles. “Luna was born in the middle of the pandemic. I wanted my closest friends to know about her and see her grow up. It was the most ideal solution. All the people following that account have been vetted by me. As a kid, you wouldn’t be cool to know that your parents put up your pictures when you were a toddler. In the future, if Luna is not okay with it, the account will be taken down. It is about respecting her privacy and opinion.” 

Just like Uchil, things are extremely simple for Pranay Jain, a close friend. “The photos that I share on WhatsApp are only for family and a set of really close friends. I don’t feel the need to hide her face there. I know every person in that group And I am clear about showing them my baby’s pictures without any filters,” says the father to one-year-old Tara. 

When asked about it, Dordi hits the nail right on the head, “Let's not forgot how we grew up. We had photo albums, didn't we? And those were accessible only to family members and close friends. Whatever was there in those snaps was for selective viewing.”

While the times have changed, one thing about the pictures, with a filter or not, hasn’t...they’ll always have a lot of heart!