There is nothing like a red lip for that illusive self-love lift

Most of us have, tucked somewhere in a wardrobe or drawer, a favourite fashion item that’s reliably empowering, whether it gets put on for a special date or an important meeting, either in the office or on Zoom. Maybe it is a great pair of heels, or a pretty piece of keepsake jewellery—that unique addition that immediately makes you feel more confident. For me, there’s just one stylish accessory like that, applied liberally and, literally, every day: red lipstick.

Red lipstick does indeed suit my colouring, but wearing it represents so much more than just reaping the benefits of a visually flattering cosmetic. After swiping it on daily for many years, it has become an expression of me. The best me. With my crimson lips—usually in a bluish-red tone, and more often matte than glossy—I’m invincible. This not-especially-expensive accessory makes me feel in control, ready to handle anything the day or evening brings; rebellious, or sophisticated, or fashionable, depending on the occasion. And always, it makes me feel stronger, smarter, better. On a bad day, it boosts my self-esteem swiftly towards being the ‘me’ I aspire to be when, if I’m being honest, the reality is very far from that.

Wearing red lipstick has helped me gradually accept and appreciate what’s not perfect about my features—at least, not the clichéd version of ‘perfect’ that’s on television and computer screens. My lips are quite full; a slick of pronounced colour draws attention to their ampleness instead of underplaying it. As a teenager, I started putting it on as a sign of charged defiance, an unmissable rebellion against the lips I saw on celebrities’ faces, which were thin, delicate, and usually covered in a slather of neutral pale pink. Now, many years later, I find my lips commanding, proud of their broad dimensions; these days, they seem wonderfully voluptuous instead of embarrassing. Looking in the mirror today, with that flattering crimson mouth staring back, I realise that I have also grown to be delighted with my face’s other ‘flaws’: the bump in my nose, skin that’s so fair it gets sunburnt in just a few minutes on bright days, a chin that’s a bit too prominent.

I am not, of course, the only woman to have relied on red lipstick for its assertive strength. My Cockney grandmother was a fan, for example, having watched her mother apply it each morning; she wore it daily until she died on the way to work, aged 85. Inspirational women such as US politician Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez love it too, using it as an expression of their boldness and self-assurance. Regardless of ethnicity, generation, lifestyle, or occupation, red lipstick flatters and invigorates. Unlike so much other fashion that’s tricky—such as the overpriced, unworn, hot-pink mini skirt currently in my wardrobe—it is inclusive, global, and regularly energising for the millions of women who love it as much as I do.

“Red has that truly universal quality,” agrees Melissa Butler, who founded the American cosmetics brand The Lip Bar. “It transcends age. It transcends skin tone. It just works across the board.” Her collection’s bestseller is—what else?—a rich cherry. “It’s a power colour—the type of shade that gives you enough confidence to take on the day and lets you know that you can own the room,” she says. The ideal hue for a female entrepreneur such as Butler, it’s called, appropriately enough, Bawse (boss) Lady.

Red lipstick can also express resolve and hope. I have heard from women who put it on after surgery to regain a sense of normality and femininity. Case in point: Henrietta Lovell, the Founder of Rare Tea Company, who, while running her business and writing her memoir, successfully fought breast cancer. Before each operation, she would be asked to take off her make-up. “You are kind of stripped of everything and you are in a hospital gown—you’re not really a human, just a patient,” she recalls. So, after each ordeal, she would paint her lips with a liberal application of vivid, fire-engine red because, as she puts it: “The first thing I want to do is put on my lipstick and I’m transformed. I’m now identifiable as an individual.”

The way Lovell wore red lipstick in hospital mirrors is how I feel when I apply it on challenging days, especially during this topsy-turvy year of unease. “It’s about being brave and finding a way to put on some armour," she says. “It’s a battle. When you’re feeling a little shabby, the red lipstick hides all that. It is the first thing people see.” I couldn’t agree more. 

Rachel Felder is the author of Red Lipstick: An Ode to a Beauty Icon. Here are her picks for some of the best red lipsticks there are out there.